two thirty

a really stupid joke i once heard goes: “what time is it when you have to go to the dentist?” (two thirty)

i have a tooth that is really bothering me. but what is bothering me even more is that i have neither funds nor insurance to even think about a dental visit. and won’t until november (which is when insurance will kick in).

but i don’t think this is going to wait that long.

add to this that my general level of self-care (i.e., checkup, dental, etc.) over the last eight years is best classified as ‘none’. never had insurance long enough or money enough to see to it and pretty much have spent this time being thankful for good health (or at least not having anything dramatic happen).

looks like that’s about to change and i’m kind of stressed for it. the simple fact is, my teeth are in terrible shape and have been for a while now. they’ve never been ‘good teeth’. i have inherited crooked, mis-aligned, and generally poor teeth. the resulting years of neglect have taken decidedly steep toll and i know for a fact that my mouth is infected and more than a few teeth are in need of serious care (if it isn’t already too late).

i’ve been struggling with caring for them by flossing, brushing, and rinsing combined with regular peroxide washes and anti-bacterial rinses. but it has finally gone past the point that these things will mitigate.

about three weeks ago, i either lost a filling or one of my molars cracked. i’m not sure which, but i was left with a hole. i’ve been trying to keep it rinsed and clean, but it isn’t working… and today, i cannot chew on the right side at all for the pain.

there is a VERY sore spot in the crease where gums meet jaw and i’m afraid it’s about to abscess.

the horror stories i’ve read about dental infections traveling to the brain is hovering in my mind and frankly, i’m a bit scared.

my roomie tells me that he knows a good dentist, but this isn’t going to be cheap by far and i haven’t met a dentist yet that will work for free.

on the other hand, this gives me something very concrete to fret over, as opposed to the various nebulous things that usually occupy my mind. reckon you have to take it where you can find it, eh?

i’m angry. i’m about to start work. not this monday, but next, in fact. and seems to me that, one way or another, this is going to interfere.

i’m not liking that. but it doesn’t seem i’m going to be able to help it. just a matter of degree, i suppose. the degree to which this is going to muck things, that is.

i’m going to check and see if there are any dental schools around here. i recall reading that some offer free dental care in exchange for letting pre-grad students do your work for course credit.

i’m really looking forward to the day when i take care of myself just like the normal folks do. if you know what i mean.

sigh.

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