quoting me to myself, i’d laugh, but i’m too busy crying:
“to see it all and realize this and know it is a choice freely made in every moment.”
speaking of choices, specifically, the choice to suffer.
i need to remember this and pull it more deeply into me. i need to understand fully why i choose to suffer for him, for the other four, and i need to find a way to choose differently.
i do not know how to do so in this moment. so instead, i note this to myself, an underscore of sorts.
remember this. speak it often. read and re-read it. make it sink in.