wowsah. you know, one of the coolest things about Buddhism is how it is literally reshaping my perspectives on people. i had not realize what a cynic i’d become until i started meeting people and having ‘all this Buddhism’ show me in some pretty interesting ways how others are delightful, precious, amazing, and utterly beautiful beings.
i can see it changing how i deal with others. and i can see even the places where it is starting to change how i think about others. which is exciting and kind of scary all at once.
putting this example here for myself.
***** wrote:
> No… Thank you… for answering me…
> It is funny, i was thinking very loud all the
> ideas that I try to write you. I think it is
> because we are not very close. Have you seen
> that people that speak to loud when they are
> using headphones?…. something like that. I do
> not know but I think I hava some volume on my
> mind.
i like the way you said that. sometimes, i too, have ‘volume on my mind’ and my own thoughts get in the way of what is really happening. perspective versus what is, you know?
thinking an idea out loud is a really good way to do things. so is saying it out loud. sometimes, saying it helps more than thinking it though… saying it means you make your brain do the whole chain of work to get the thought out, which means you’re much more likely to ‘feel it’, ‘be it’, and ‘experience it’.
closeness, i find, is a matter of perspective, too. as a Buddhist, i feel close to most people, and generically, to all people. while it is true there are many more people alive in the world than i will ever know, it is also true that the ones i meet are precious and deserve my attention, compassion, and many other things besides.
i’m not always the best at giving them. but i do try. so thank you for noticing. (smile)
> Any way, I am always trying to read between the
> words, there is always a hidden messege. I am
> just trying to follow what i am feeling… not
> easy!
there is not always something between the lines. and most times, if there is, you can’t read it, because it isn’t written in the language of words, but in the language of non-words, and everyone uses that non-language a little bit differently (if at all).
here, most times, there is nothing between the words. so you’re going to get a headache looking. (grin)
and i find it is usually wisdom to live as if there is never anything between the words. it certainly helps when avoiding coming to the wrong conclusions about others, which makes me much more able to be kind. i think that is a worthy goal, don’t you?
> You have a dream job (is that correct?… sorry
> I am still learning English)… I mean many
> people will like to have a job like yours.
hmm. i enjoy my work, yes. i don’t think i would call it a dream job. my dream job i had and lost in a layoff. but that’s another story. and ‘dream job’ as most people mean it usually refers to ‘not having to do much work’ and ‘getting lots of money for which i didn’t really do much if anything’… which means i’m not very interested in dream jobs as a whole, because i really do enjoy the act of working and the feeling that the work i do matters, makes a difference, and that its outcome is something i can really see and experience as a thing/presence/or result in the world.
i suppose to that end, the end that it affect and supports and nourishes me (both literally and figuratively) yes, it would be a dream job. hmm. isn’t that interesting? i started out saying i didn’t think so, but wound up saying that, yes, in fact, it is a dream job.
go figure. (grin)
> So, you are the person that tell the owners what
> way their bussines should take… maybe it is a
> huge responsability.
well… yes and no. actually, i tell business owners how to do something they want to do for the least amount of money, with the most amount of chance that the savings they find in it won’t be eaten up by having sloppy workflow or other redundant processes that immediately absorb it.
in a perfect world, why yes, analysts would create amazing things that would result in everyone being on permanent vacation and we’d all get paid. heh. but in reality, the compromise is knowing where the comfort level of the owner is, understanding the ‘perfect world’ just doesn’t exist, and coming up with the closest you can get to it without depressing everyone in the process.
all of which is a long way of saying, ‘i make my living by seeing what the perfect world would look like when no one else can, then finding a way to settle for a realistic one so someone can feel its possible to get even one step closer to the perfect one.’
but then, i always did think too much. (wink)
> When you know more about yourself, you know more
> about everything… about yur books you are
> wrong when you say that just you are interested
> in them, and you probably know it. When I was
> talking about information, I was talking about
> that kind of information.
i really do not spend much time thinking about how much someone else might get from what i think or say. i think of it just long enough to keep a record of things, in case i accidentally ever say something really meaningful… (usually by mistake, you know, and almost never in knowledge of having done so).
but i also keep them around to teach myself how to think more clearly, to point out the places and times when i didn’t manage it, to remind myself of where my ugly spots are (we all have them, and boy, they sure can hide when we’re not looking at them!), and to keep my ego in check until i can figure out how to kill the silly, vain thing.
so the reason i don’t think much about it is simply because i see no way TO think about it without winding up some arrogant windbag who’d rather hear her own voice than anyone else’s. (and to be honest, as much as i write, i still get that accusation, even when it just isn’t true).
so. no. i don’t really think i’ll believe that my efforts to just manage not to fall over sideways, or avoid stubbing my toe on that really sharp rock over there… or to somehow, mysteriously, magically not trip over my own feet for more than five seconds in a row is impressive, interesting, unusual, or even noteworthy.
you see, i can’t really find it to be any of that because i still remember all the times i did all of these things… because i wrote them down. (grin) pesky writing. i really should stop, you know. but i just can’t.
> Seems you are a nice person, please keep in
> touch wit me, I will really apreciate that.
i appreciate the note, apologize for the tidal wave of reply, grin sheepishly and say that i think you are a very nice person too… and if you don’t drown in this, feel free to write again and i’m sure to send another surge your way… it’s what i do. 🙂