i am discovering the benefit of floating.
most of the people i ever encountered who spoke of floating were using it to define the act of not caring. but that’s not what i mean by it. rather, caring without the need to touch, hold, or grapple.
i have to admit, it feels weird. there are very few areas of life that remain in which this rather soft, cushioned feeling isn’t seeping in and just… pushing everything else out of the way.
i am not real sure where it is coming from, nor can i say it ‘feels permanent’. but it’s definitely here.
the benefit seems to be that events and things that ‘normally’ would have me either screaming to the stars or unable to get out of bed just aren’t sticking like they used to, or hurting. it’s somewhat like watching a movie. that’s the kind of ‘distant’ sense of it. as opposed to feeling hyper reality.
on the other hand, the spaces that aren’t cushioned are pretty much on red-line. but even that doesn’t feel like ‘a problem’.
(note 04-28-07: i saved this as a draft from the library. came back to it and wasn’t sure if i wanted to post it or not. but what the heck, right? heh. )