what does that title mean or say to you? if you were to see it somewhere, placed by someone you know, what would you think?
i think someone thinks themselves innocent. or perhaps they think i am innocent. i ponder it. i wonder about it. i will never know.
my mind replied to it immediately as if the former rather than the latter. i suspect projection. i try not to feel badly. sometimes i succeed.
i wish i had been more adamant earlier. perhaps it would have ended the same, but at least i would not have felt as if i were losing something precious and beautiful.
i wish i could be furious. and innocent. i feel neither…. just weary and sore and wistful.
i envy them if they can manage to feel furious and innocent.
not really. i just say that to make myself feel better, the suspicion is sharp and hurtful.
there are no innocents. there are no guilty. just is.
i really need to stop keeping up with things i say i’m leaving behind.
old habits die hard.