as you know if you read here at all frequently, this is the place where the sticky stuff comes to land so it isn’t running around in my head all the time. that does tend to make it seem as if i am a wholly unhappy, possibly terminally depressed person.
but if you ever met me, you know better.
there are a number of you who read here and have never met me. so you really don’t know better. and rather than have you think i’m all the above, on occasion, i post one of these to specifically point you to the ‘about’ page here AND to say, point blank, that i am not as unhappy, depressed, angry, et al as some of these posts make it out.
i’m almost obscenely happy to be in seattle.
i’m thrilled at the prospect of never moving again.
i’m tickled pink at the notion of rebuilding and then, getting completely lost in the cultural and arts community here.
i’m considering actually doing more than thinking about those books skulking about in the back of my head.
i’m giddy for the idea of actually being able to get back to the pool and work on hydroaerobics at long last.
i’m looking forward to my daughter’s thanksgiving visit and happy every day to know she’s in the world and swinging it by it’s damn tail.
i’m goofily happy to be the companion of my two, adorable cats.
i’m equally content to be in the company of a truly good, compassionate, and caring friend who has been largely responsible for seeing my ten year dream into reality.
i’m looking forward to the seasons as they will be displayed at the japanese garden. expect to see more photography and better quality photography as my situation and settling in continues here.
i sit on the patio every darn day and meditate and savor the greenery, the breeze, the weather and almost constantly blue skies.
and, for all i write about the things that make me unhappy, sad, angry, frustrated, or depressed, i just as often remember and think about happy things and happy people and all the wonder and delight i’ve known in my life as a direct result of those i’ve met. i don’t talk much about it here because, let’s face it, effusiveness tends to be more offputting to others than moroseness (sad, but true).
finally, bear in mind that i’m not trying to convince you. no more than i’ve ever tried to convince you of the negatives. or anything else, really. i’m just saying that if you stumble in here and get lost in the tar pits, here’s a hand or stick or whatever to remind you that it isn’t always as it may read. almost never, really.
and when it is, well, struggling just makes it worse. (crooked grin)