Now, you have to know that any day that begins with a mandatory, company wide “Code of Conduct” session is not the best day of the year. Props to the HR folks, they work hard to make it interesting and fun, but let’s face it, there’s only so much fun to be had in Olympus or Sinai style mandates, no matter how many prizes are handed out for getting the questions right.
Or when, as it turns out, trying to do the right thing winds up uncorking a barrel of monkies that you just got truly finished hawking for fear of it busting out when you least expect it.
This, of course, is the oblique way (euphemistically, I suppose) of saying that, “Lo! Observe the fearful reality! No matter how well intended, there are certain things you just shouldn’t bring up because everyone’s head explodes.” Which, of course, means that I slipped up and broke one of my own cardinal rules (to wit): “Thou shalt not raise the ghosts of the past.”
Interestingly, it seems revisionist history is in play (I didn’t need to know this) and a good bit of that history has now been reformed in more palatable image. Not that it really matters but for the brimstone that ignites in my stomach when I think about it.
Also, for myself, a reminder: No matter how sincerely people say they want to hear about something, if it’s really ugly and troublesome, they just don’t and if you insist upon taking them at face value, you should expect them to dredge up whatever they can to deflect it or turn it into something that may be used to drive it right back underground.
I have experienced both today and, resultingly, left for home feeling both as if I am doubly stupid for believing any of it AND a full-on idiot for allowing the aforesaid barrel of monkies to be tapped and opened in any way whatever.
Why do I say this? Well, because somehow, not only does it seem my initial concerns are being made light of (other than required response for putting them in writing along with a convenient suggestion that I “just come talk about it” in future), but suddenly, magically, it is no longer about the concerns at all but (prepare for shock and surprise!) about ME.
All because I actually fell for being baited into talking about history.
Great.
So, cue up the polka music, line up the monkies, and get your dancing shoes on because it looks like here we go again, whether I like it or not.
I told someone just last week that it feels very much as if some folks are trying very, very hard to convince me to find the door and use it.
This has done nothing to dissuade me of that opinion.