archival.
anyway.
the weekend has been well. it feels like vajrayana has really caught me. thoughts and insights just foaming up out of nothingness. really rather incredible. most logged at ef, but not all.
i make of michael and heath teachers. removing them from the universe of people as others, and setting them instead as manifestations of daka wisdom.
in this manner, i neutralize my bhain sidhe. and i use the negative things they choose… to learn… teach me where my lingering ego hides, also how i have been unskillful in relating to them and hence, responsible for the outcome.
i include this in my practice as well… taking these thoughts and aligning them with the 37 practices of the bodhisattva to more deliberately underscore things and insist upon learning.
i am changing in strange ways. only i don’t think i’m changing. i think i’m remembering. that is how it feels. i used to know these things. long ago. i’m puzzled why i chose to forget them.
but i will not spend too much time wondering why… it is past, and the most important thing going forward is to remember. and to not make the same mistakes again, to not create suffering in others.
slow learning, but learning still.
let’s see… what else… i did laundry. i bought a new hard drive. i enjoyed the breeze. i drank good coffee. i sang loud and off-key (on purpose) for my cats. i visited with a Sangha sister. i sat and thought about doing a good deed ‘just because i can’ (and will soon do the deed itself).
i caught up with my daughter. i learned more about my son. i spoke with a friend who asks me advice as if i am worthy to give it. i met the largest cat i’ve seen in years and he let me scratch his belly.
i remembered many things and chose to forget many more, and continue to smile for the manner in which the universe entire feeds and nourishes when we let it.
all in all, yes, an insightful weekend.
i hope you are well. *smile*