post-feast

it is good to have my daughter here. i wish she lived here. turns out she’s going back two days eariler than expected, which already has me sighing, but i understand. school on monday and she can’t afford to miss classes.

bleh.

we’ll be hitting da mall today, hilarity and adventure are sure to ensue.

i am in a very odd mood today. my mind is behaving like a caffienated monkey on crack. yeah. that’s a good mental image, very accurate.

i’m missing people. and i’m melancholy because the one here is leaving tomorrow. isn’t it silly? i should be enjoying now and instead, i’m almost crying because she is leaving tomorrow.

correction… no longer future tense.

bleh.

anyway. thoughts of the bastard overseas that i’m not indulging. thoughts of the bastard in texas that i’m not indulging. it’s comical to me how my mind tries to parade it all across my consciousness and make it out as some unrelenting swath of loss.

fuck you, monkey mind. i’m happy. i am in the place i want to be. i am in the perfect dream job of a lifetime. i roll in a beautiful car that is comfortable to my poor, arthritic ass. i am saving money toward the things i need and i have a good friend who loves and cares for me, and my daughter is here, today, and we’ve the whole day to have fun and enjoy one another and FUCK YOU but you’re not going to draw me in with your fucking eeyore down by the god damn river pessimism and angst anymore.

so there.

whew. wow. that felt good.

hah. guess what?

IT WORKED! 🙂

love you all.

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