It’s official; something is about to change; I am no longer going to set any effort toward trying to fix a problem that no one but myself wants to solve. And I’m certainly not going to go out of my way to seek efficiency when it’s considered more effective to make three people run in circles for up to three months at a stretch than to have two people wait two to five days so that everyone can move forward without having to run in circles at all.
I slept on it. I didn’t post when it was hot in my mind and I was angry about it. I’m also not posting the various insights and conclusions reached as a direct result of the (now) almost seven months of experience and exposure to a particular set of “principles”.
It has taken almost two years for my heart to catch up with my head, but they are now perfectly in synch… it is time to seek effectiveness and quite beyond time to stop contributing to ongoing, systemic failure (yes, even if it can manage to paint itself dancing rather than staggering or limping).
The nicest part in this is having the awful sense of failure and dismay disappear. This is not my doing; its seeds were planted long before I arrived and its leeching presence is preferentially nourished. It is not my fault. I am not to blame. I will not contribute to it now that I see it for what it is (as this is the one thing that would remove the word “not” from the previous sentences).
The relief is rather profound.
It is time.