a reply given to another on the matter of being intelligent, educated, or wise… and of the nature of the heart and the struggle with the mind.
hrm. well. for what it is worth, i’m a simpleton without an education. 8th grade drop out… got my GED in 1985. intellect is a nice shield, yes, but it can’t defend the heart. then again, the heart needs no defense. funny how that works.
hypersensitive, or compassionate? i would guess the latter, perhaps not yet fully embraced. Trungpa wrote well and tenderly of the broken-hearted warrior and of how the open heart is ever heavy, but able to bear all heaviness.
interestingly, it is the thing we seek most to enclose and protect. we build great walls, dig deep moats, barricade and barb-wire and mine it… as if such things can stop the wind… as if the heart is not, itself, diamond, indestructible, and infinitely resilient.
fearlessness is the ironic armor of the heart. protecting by refusing to protect. perhaps retreat is giving you the chance to feel that fearlessness, build tolerance of it in the mind, until the moment in which willingness to delight in the ache that is compassion outweighs all sense of self.
then again, i am a bug. what do i know? (smile)