some years ago, i wrote a piece describing an actual event in which my daughter and i, eating a chinese dinner, received two fortune cookies; one containing no fortune (mine) and one containing double fortunes (hers).
at the moment, it struck me profoundly not only for the weirdness of the actuality, but as well for what those double fortunes said. the second one she received we determined would ‘be mine’ and upon its reading, a contemplation later that night ensued and i wrote the piece called ‘fortune cookie’, which rests here in the archives.
i mention it because tonight, i had a chinese meal, and, in the single fortune cookie received, double fortunes. it is the second time in my entire life that it has happened. and the happening immediately reminded me of the first and also has instilled in me, in this moment, a sense that the messages contained must hold some deeper meaning for me.
i’m writing this before even reading them. let’s see what they say…
the first says, “when in doubt, let your instincts guide you.”
i chuckle lightly for a variety of reasons, primary of which is that this is something i do naturally and often without thinking. there is part of me that finds it a bad thing, and part of me that thinks it is my one, truest connection with the universe itself.
despite my tone, tenor, or words, it remains that every act and word i undertake has, at its heart, a good intention. especially the harsh words, because it is difficult for me to give them, even when fully angered and they are deserved.
i have recently given such words to someone much in need of them, as i was at last turning fully and utterly from them. it was painful to do so, even as i know without knowing how i know it that those words were necessary. instinctive.
setting that train of thought aside, i pick up the other fortune… it reads, “a pleasant surprise is in store for you soon.”
this too, brings a chuckle, because for all i often mope and moan here, a good deal of my day to day life is filled with laughter and happiness and every day is, in many ways, a pleasant surprise…. a thing to be savored, enjoyed, and experienced fully.
i wish i could say that the notion of a ‘pleasant surprise’ was something that created a sense of anticipation in me, but let’s face it, they’re pre-printed fortune cookies, right?
here, a third chuckle… because i’m lying. if you’ve read here at all, you already know this. i find every happening, no matter how great or small, a thing intended to lend to my learning and becoming. it is the foundational belief that has kept me from many things, including an early ending.
perhaps the ‘pleasant surprise’ was simply to have another such moment, one that both reminded me of the previous one as well as underscored all the things i thought and found in that moment… and created in this moment an echo of a delicate and beautiful thing… a gift from the universe to remind me that i am cherished, treasured, and part of the great all.
then again, maybe it is just some random thing, with no meaning whatsoever.
who is to say? but between the two, i find i prefer the one where my presence here is something other than meaningless… and that all things of existance are meant to lend to me insight, learning, and progress.
i suppose that may well seem any number of things to those who would read this… but i’ll not list those adjectives, because i also happen to think that to say a thing is to ask a thing to exist or come into existance. mindfully, i refrain.
and so, i sit here, taking small sips of the wonton soup inbetween paragraphs, and i think about this moment… and the echo of another moment… and the wonder of feeling cherished in both moments… and i am smiling.