AI-090906.mp3 Active Imagination Sequence Saturday, September 9, 2006 Starting from nothing (originally recorded and transcribed here, the actual vocal languished on the mini recorder until tonight, 02-27-07. Found it while cleaning out the recorder’s folders. had to record it into the system by mic, hence the scratchiness. )

i am in a very odd state of mind today. hard to describe. whenever i get like this, i tend to wander through various e-sanghas and look for the universe to give me insight, direction, some form of learning.

took a nap and had a dream. in it, i was sitting at a table in some coffee shop and over time, five others arrive who will remain unidentified except as their actions/words might reveal to those who read and have knowledge enough to know them.

how bizarre. i had an extensive contemplation written and, when i went to publish it, it disappeared into the void.

unemployment filed. should kick in just about the time i’ll need it. relief. yes. strange synchronicities, an email smile from a friend in California and mention of a television series. hint of an inquiry as to my interest in scriptwriting. i’m curious. and interested. we’ll see.

it is interesting the manner in which the universe often sends confirmations and the like when least expected and therefore, most helpful.

great news. the unemployment office won’t allow me to file without a copy of my last paystub. four hours at the department of labor with no results has done little to improve my mindset.

ever tell you what you fear never what you want to hear you disdained me this choice giving light to shadow’s voice hate me for shadow voice saying things you’d have unsaid as if they do not curl and hiss silently within your head no doomsaying do i undertake or ill end would i cast only set light to your shadow that it might safely pass moments bloom and fade lessons brought and passed in the quiet kharma glade all actions reactions cast om mani padme hum dralas on the wind spin sweet dharmachakra bring all to fruitful end

waking from sleep. suddenly. i recognize this. ok. nod. there it is. what of it? nothing. seems to me it has all happened precisely as it should. i remind myself of my roles. i once listed them to another, and at that time, they insisted rather forcefully that i was incorrect. i chuckle to think of it in this moment, as time and events have demonstrated rather pointedly that, as usual, i was spot on in every way.

i have no idea what comes next. and having moved through the initial fear, i find myself strangely exhilarated. at this moment, all possibilities exist. there’s something uniquely beautiful about it. it will not last, of course. nothing does. the on-going lesson of inpermanence is sometimes difficult to accept, but i try more than i used to… perhaps that counts for something.