yeshes.online

for those who cannot see the videos here, this blog is going private (as in no more access) effective wednesday.  i’m leaving it open long enough for everyone who says they read here daily to see this. if you want to stay in touch with me, i suggest you hit the ‘connect’ button up top and send a request for email if you do not have it already. and if you have the email address or the phone number, i respectfully request you use it, as my time of courting response and begging contact are over. as in “I’m done.” […]

self-explanatory. click through to view.

they sit at the back table, having dinner. not exactly a special occasion, just getting out of the house and giving both of them a night without dishing washing. they take turns entertaining the child; who has eaten and is not yet old enough to be willing to grant someone else’s needs space over their own. the man startles slightly. his cell phone, clipped to his side, has gone off. obviously, unexpectedly. habit reveals him as he involuntarily unclips it and is looking at it before he can stop himself. a flash of impatience flits over the woman’s face, but […]

i had a long post here. i re-read it and decided it did not need to be written. suffice to say some things can’t be helped and i often have very real problems coming to terms with it when i encounter it. i am telling myself that it doesn’t have to matter. we’ll see how successful i am with this approach.

the shadow wood its tangled roots of memory and ancient pain still beautiful if darkly so walk its paths to find peace

hey stone, this one’s for you — a thank you for the link to the tao online. once, long ago, i began reading it and got to the second verse before life pulled me away and i didn’t return to it until now. picking up where i left off, verse three, i chuckled. what better example, eh? verse three is timely. so i thank you for that as well: Not praising the worthy prevents contention, Not esteeming the valuable prevents theft, Not displaying the beautiful prevents desire. In this manner the sage governs people: Emptying their minds, Filling their bellies, […]

it occurs to me that friendships die for one of three reasons: – major life change – neglect – betrayal one day, you wake up and you can no longer help asking, “why do i consider this person a friend?” i am learning that when that question is sitting in your mind, it’s time for a change.

one of the things i regret about getting older is that i’m not as willing to really let loose with anger the way i used to. this rant is hardly as all out as i’d LIKE to go. but it is as far as i can let myself go unless i want to go totally over the edge. age and wisdom tell me that is not advisable. like i said…. i feel regret for it. sigh. as always, click through to view.

the disturbing dream of last night leaves a trail. further research is required, and i have a short list of the things that need to be immediately ruled out. we’ll see how that goes before thinking on it more. it may just be the usual over-reaction to a strong weather front. the rain is here today. hah. obviously, i have no idea as yet. but this time around, i think there’ll be no rest until i find out. in the meanwhile, compression socks and layered binding on the ankles to keep the water out of them or at least to […]

The trip to the office is uneventful, rapid, even. Like life cleared the way to insure I didn’t miss this event. I never have liked the sterile, beige-white buildings. Or the antiseptic smell. I sit nervously waiting in the front office. Why is it you always have to wait when you have an appointment? It’s bad enough you’re waiting for answers that have the potential to change the course of your life. It’s like sitting in the waiting room of life, really. That’s how it feels. Like sitting, waiting for someone to tell you that life has decided you get […]