(a final update before bed… the machine is still acting up, but it turns out the crashes seem to be related to something happening either with the browser or possibly something happening in the file permission structure. in the meantime, sadder happenings.) This is a very hard letter for me to write, but I think the time has come that it is obvious and I see no reason to continue trying to pretend otherwise.
timing sucks
so ok, i just posted earlier today about the imac of my dreams, right? well about fifteen minutes ago, my g5 gave the first of what is sure to be several death rattles on its way to dying. i kid you not. system diagnostics say there’s something wrong with the board and the hard drive has been returning SMART failure since i got it in september of last year. i’ve back up the important stuff to a portable drive (thanks mike!) and if it dies, i’m not losing everything as i have the last three times this has happened. on […]
doesn’t take much…
you know, sometimes the sheer silliness of it all makes me laugh. it does not take that much to make me happy. really. and when i’m coming up out of a funk, i think about that and i have to laugh. why is it that when you’re in a funk, the last thing you think about is how little it would take to make you happy? i begin to think there’s some kind of logical/mental shutdown that gets in the way.
this is why i do not go to ebay!
damn it. i forbid myself to go to ebay until or unless i have money to spend, which is never these days. and this is why… http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230235182423 the very imac i would need. and look at that price. damn it. DAMN IT. sigh.
tideline
i couldn’t decide if i wanted to blog this or not. i am mostly because it’s the only way to insure the stuff doesn’t get lost in a hardware failure or whatnot. i’m ambivalent yet on the matter of completely sieving the blog or of ending the archiving of things. bleh. until i decide, it’s business as usual. (recording: tideline.mp3) read on for the words…
Lost Pages – Lamentation of Rán
“True, I talk of dreams, Which are the children of an idle brain, Begot of nothing but vain fantasy, Which is as thin of substance as the air And more inconstant than the wind, who wooes Even now the frozen bosom of the north, And, being anger’d, puffs away from thence, Turning his face to the dew-dropping south.” So a noble one once spoke, in literature that were, itself, a fantasy. Speaking of the balmy breeze not of love, but of that passing infatuation, the fantasy unattainable, which eventually shifts and departs. It is so with many hearts in the […]
anatomy of a bad day
6:30am – wake up with stomach feeling like it’s pompeii 8:30am – finally decide to take the day off and try to sleep through pompeii 12:30pm – admit there’s no sleep to be had and drive to the store for pepto and hopefully, relief 12:35pm – decide to toss the bag of trash that’s been sitting in the passenger floorboard for two weeks. 12:36pm – feel the wind pick up and the sound of a “click” from behind you as the truck door blows closed, effectively locking your keys and everything else in your truck. 12:40pm – finally find a […]
inappropriate
i don’t pay attention to the lines i color where i want to bold strokes and mismatched splash, dash, and crash and burn, most times i am inappropriate wanting it all willing to reach for it hands swollen and scarred for the many rules and rulers telling me how inappropriate i am it is inappropriate not to care for the labels to just care for people for life for living for loving i am inappropriate abnormal and lacking too loud, too intense too much, too often everyone says so it must be true, right?
down the road
“so, what do you think of the place?” i ask the question with some trepidation, knowing it is, at best, humble by the world’s considerations. “i love it. it really reflects where you are in life.” he replied.
808 days
808 days from the start date to the end date, end date included. Or 2 years, 2 months, 18 days including the end date. 808 days can be converted to one of these units: 69,811,200 seconds 1,163,520 minutes 19,392 hours 115 weeks (rounded down) Me? I just happy there is an end date. March 19, 2008. Happy there’ll be no anniversary, happy that once I make this post, I’ll forget even this….. happy.