i swear i am sincerely, deathly, totally apologetic for any humor i ever made about the hormonal changes that happen after 40. but i admit it’s only because i’m enduring them now and they are not fun. sigh.
square the circle
a full circle isn’t really reality cubed on itself patterns repeat around the bush giddy run breathlessly
city park
near my house is a park. it is an open and beautiful place. it has lots of trees, lush, thick, green grass, and plenty of parking. the park never closes. it has no gates or cordons to restrict passage. there are playgrounds and flower gardens, a hand-built wishing well, a dirt field fit for baseball or frisbee or dog walking. but every time i go by it, it is empty.
grouch
i’m tired, i’m broke, my head is about to pop from the pollen, my arthritis is kicking my ass, and i’m pissed for being so bored that i’ve actually considered trying to go find a television to watch. where the hell are my friends? no. scratch that. i know where they are and you know what? they can stay there. i’m going to bed.
wow. (blush and smile)
out of the blue tonight, i receive an email that one of my previous co-workers at the game company has found me on linked in and graced me with an unexpected recommendation. “…. was one of the main creative forces driving the video game. It was her creative writing that motivated myself and other artist to create the world. Her writing will continue to inspire and motivate where ever she goes, it was a pleasure being a part of the world she created.” (sic) wow. really. i felt so crushed when the lay off came and even moreso when the […]
still more on symbols and such(ness)
taking a short break from drilling out process for work, and a friend’s email sent me an interesting bit of insight. i always find it comforting and rather curious when things that i think i’ve created turn out to be ancient bits of thought. i find it an experiential confirmation of connectedness. i mean, seriously, can you run into this kind of thing regularly and maintain doubt? i can’t.
omg, slept through!
for the first time in almost three weeks, i actually slept through the night. consider me bouncing with happy. i sit here looking at four packets of flower seeds….
this is not insomnia! :)
heh. i took a nap so am up later than i would be. i’m so pleased this isn’t insomnia that i could scream. and yes, thank you, i did wake in a much better mood. i also trash even MORE of ‘the archives’ and did so with a smile. removing names that hurt to look at feels good, particular since the only time they hurt anymore is when i see them unexpectedly. noting particularly deep or meaningful to talk about today and you know what? i think that may well be a relief, too. i wrote a letter today that […]
cabin fever or something
it’s going to rain. i’m achy for it. the neck is NOT happy. work was a bore today. weird week is up and i’m like a frakking over-ripe fruit. no, you really don’t want to know what that means. grouch factor is high and on the heels of what seems to be yet another abandonment, i’ve gone through and ripped out all related archives. you know, it actually felt pretty damn good to just do it and not wait (and hurt) for months before giving up. the pit cackles madly, ‘fuck ’em’. at the moment, i’m in agreement. very much […]
nifty cool kalideoscope maker
very cool and good for occupying this insomniac. http://www.zefrank.com/dtoy_vs_byokal/index.html