10-28-06, what you never understood

The thing you never understood about it… you always accused me of ‘lashing out at you’ but I wasn’t lashing out at you. Lashing out at you is an intent…an intent of hurting, and intent of being negative. That was never what I did to you. That was never my intent in what I was sending to you.

10-28-06, pm

it occurred to me today. the understanding, that is. for a long time, i knew there was something out of place, wrong, and irrational in how you presented the matter. i couldn’t quite put my finger on it. it slipped away from the grasping of my mind, for some time i was lost in my effort of seeking understanding.