things are really cranking up at work. and i’m cranking up right along with them. i’m hesitant to really detail it since it’s not possible without breaking nda. heh. suffice to say all the things i’ve learned along my personal and professional life are coming in very, very handy. also, everyone is surprised how much ‘bandwidth’ i have to bring (and am bringing). it used to be that this discovery wound me up working myself out of a job. here, it’s actually gaining me stars and kudos. yeah, i’m liking that. :) my direct report is (as i’m told by […]
chamomile clouds
one of the interesting tidbits about chamomile is that, when ingested, it has a decidedly bitter flavor. however its scent is one of the more relaxing things provided by nature. and, despite its flavor, it is a flower/herb with decidedly calm inducing properties; often taken as an anti-anxiety or sedative aide. i brought home a lavender-chamomile dispenser in the on-going war against cat box oder. it’s working very, very nicely, but my roomie isn’t so sure he likes it. he’s a french-vanilla fellow himself, rather obsessed with it, actually. (an on-going joke between us revolves around vanilla versus french-vanilla and […]
recycling
i’ve found a really good way to manage the occasional feelings of angst, melancholia, and moroseness. it works far better than i thought (or expected) it would. instead of feeling abandoned and wondering what’s wrong with me, i feel curious about what’s wrong with ‘them’. all the ‘thems’ who went on and on about what a wonderful person i was and then, dropped out of sight. i know most of the reasons. and for the first time, i’m feeling pretty good about saying them straight up and without any sense whatever that i’m off base. after all, i’m a good, […]
a bit of fictional fancy
on a guild forum elsewhere, one of our resident game masters has posted an invitational to join him in the local tavern. in fact, he’s just installed a machine to open a dimensional portal in front of those who ‘need a drink’ and whisk them away to the place. the idea being that you have to come up with a story to explain how you get there. from there, who knows? the roleplay is fast, furious, and free-form. my favorite. this, my ‘entrance’, which seems to have gone over nicely. there will be more. i’ll tag it up so you […]
bee-ing funny @work
the following instant message conversation occurred today between myself and my direct report, the director of development. mind you, i’m posting this not only as an example of the fun i’m having, but also of the culture and the general perspective and willingness to have work be fun… or would that bee fun? read on…
oh how i love you, payday
’nuff said. it’s today. “congratulations, ms. thang, you made it through another crisis.’ my roomie woke me up today. he said, ‘come on, up and at it! be strong, be tough, be stone!’ and i looked up at him and whimpered, ‘i never wanted to be strong.’ he hugged me. it helped. up and at it, i go. hope your day goes well.
considering the now
i’m happy. and i’ve been happy for a few weeks straight. it feels weird. nice, but weird. i don’t suppose it shows very much or often here, in the charnel ground, play ground, wide open whatever ground… heh… but nonetheless, it’s true. for the first time in my life, letting something go not only didn’t hurt, it was a relief. i didn’t realize how tired i was of holding back anger and hurt in hopes of seeing it change. and i didn’t realize how ancillary i really was. you know, i keep thinking someday i will learn not to be […]
morning thought (of the day)
people never have time. people make time. time is a completely human construct. anyone who tells you ‘i just don’t have the time’ is really telling you, ‘i just don’t care to make the time.’ at core, when admitted, people never have time for the things they don’t want to do, for the things that are uncomfortable, for the things that are hard, painful, or push their boundaries beyond the norm. they always make time for the things that they perceive do not do those things. therefore, whenever you find yourself in a position where someone consistently will not make […]
the annoyance of a miscalculation
i’m a bit miffed with myself. i put myself in a position where something could happen and, naturally, it did. a lunch that rang up at $9 and change is costing me $42. and all because i let someone talk me into going to lunch with them and they ‘forgot’. bleh. i reckon if that’s the worst that happens on any given day, i’m ahead of the game. but i sure will be happy when running on fumes isn’t standard. not much else to report. i’m learning how to play M:TG again. heh. from people who KNOW. they had a […]
Character Study: Siobhan ‘Brazen’ Kislevskaia (Warhammer)
Name: Siobhan ‘Brazen’ Kislevskaia Age: late 20’s Birthplace: Kislev Description: Brazen is a tall woman for being a female human, standing about 5’9″. Her chosen career is apparent in the flame red hair and slightly smoky aura that seems to follow her movements. She is a lithe and tone woman, quick to smile, laugh, or anger. Her moods are spontaneous and often arrive or depart without warning. A confident and somewhat brash individual, she shows no demonstrable preference for companionship, even as she has no apparent distaste for people. Loyal to the point of foolishness and kinder than her initial […]