08-21-06, am

Last modified date

I had this very bizarre dream last night. In it, I was choking to death on something. It was thick in my mouth and throat, too much so to cough up or out. Panic-stricken, I sent fingers to work, and began pulling great, thick gobs of it from me.

It was like putty, of that consistency, and was slow to lift from membranes and mouth. But it was removable… This lightened the panic and as it partially opened the breathing path, the frantic nature of things was also lessened.

At this point, it became a matter of almost morbid curiosity… whatever it was, it coated my mouth and had been slowly making its way into my throat as I slept, which was what ‘woke’ me in the dream itself.

Having pulled out the ‘middle’ to open the way to breathe, I was now focused upon removing it from jaws, teeth, and tongue… I moved from the bed to the bath, looking into the mirror to see what it was and for aid in determining its full removal.

Interestingly, I could not see it in the mirror. It was invisible to sight. I laughed, but it was something of a frightened, forced laughter. In the back of my mind a voice whispered, ‘Samsara…’

It was then I realized it wasn’t just in my mouth; it was all over me, all around me, I was floating in it. It was only that somehow, during sleep, I had accidentally tried to swallow some… and, naturally, it was chokingly lethal.

I woke from this dream and my cats were curled up by my head, purring, their bodies entwined, tails laying in the same direction… peaceful.